How To Get over an Ex Who You Lost Your Virginity to at a Young Age
It can be difficult to break up with someone.It can be difficult for young people to control their emotions, so a break up can make them feel like they will never be happy again.If you lost your virginity to the person you broke up with, this goes double.It can be hard to get over having sex with someone for the first time.Most people don't spend the rest of their lives with the person they lost their virginity to, and almost everyone does eventually move on.
Step 1: Accept your feelings.
There will be a period of grieving after a relationship ends.You are going to feel sad for a while because you have suffered a loss.Allow this and accept it.Take some time to process what has happened.According to psychologists, our "firsts" are usually more memorable and have emotional power throughout our lives.It will take some time to get over your ex.You will probably never forget him, that's what it means.Don't try to forget, just accept your feelings.
Step 2: Get a sense of perspective.
While emotional firsts are powerful, it is possible to exaggerate their importance.Losing one's virginity is often seen as a major turning point in life, but for most people it isn't a defining moment.Try to put things in perspective after you've had a few days to grieve.Before you lost your virginity, you were the same person you are now.You get to define what the important romantic and sexual moments in your life are.You don't have to look back at this as a sexual experience of your life.A different type of sexual experience with someone else may be more special than the one you've had with one person.The big moment may not have happened yet.
Step 3: There is a possibility that this is not the case.
When a relationship ends, there is a tendency to think negatively of yourself.If you are not the person who ended the relationship, this is even more true.Negative self-talk can be caused by these feelings of rejection.You might be telling yourself that your ex rejected you because you are not good enough or attractive enough.You might be telling yourself that you won't find happiness again.If you've lost your virginity and have been rejected, these ideas can be hard to get rid of.Try to replace your thoughts with more positive ones.Your ex may not want to be with you anymore, but others will.She doesn't make you a lesser person because of her rejection.
Step 4: You should be realistic about the future.
When you're ready to start thinking about the future, there are two realities you should keep in mind.You will find happiness after that.You and your ex need to go their own ways.It is important to be realistic about your future happiness.You will be happy again, because you were happy before this happened.You will love other people in your life.Don't think about getting back together with your ex.Young love doesn't last.You and your ex are at a point in your lives where you are discovering who you really are.Young people are usually pushed apart by these changes.All you can do is move on with your life and allow your ex to do the same.
Step 5: Don't let the grief get to you.
Limit the amount of time you spend grieving.Setting your grief apart from other parts of your life will allow you to get past it.You may have decided that you will only grieve for an hour a day.If you set aside two blocks of 30 minutes where you allow yourself to really feel the pain, then do something else that will keep your mind occupied.Cut down to two 15 minute blocks after a while.Some people find that putting their pain in an imaginary box that they open on a regular schedule makes it boring.This can help you to get on with your life.
Step 6: Get some distance.
If you want to get over the intense feelings you are currently experiencing, the best thing you can do is put as much distance as possible between you and your ex.Call, text, or otherwise contact your ex if you want to see him.Spending time with your ex is going to make it harder for you to move on if you still have strong romantic feelings for that person.If you're ready to be friends and still want to, then give it a try.It can be difficult if you go to school with your ex.It's not necessary to be rude or pretend your ex isn't alive in order to avoid situations in which you have to interact.Ask him to do the same.
Step 7: Talk to other people.
You don't need to be alone.Share your feelings with a trusted friend or family member.It's okay to ask for help.People who talk about their exes frequently get over them more quickly than those who don't, according to psychologists.Losing your virginity is a sensitive topic so make sure to confide in someone who you can trust not to judge you or share your feelings with others.
Step 8: The memories should be put away.
You don't want to be reminded of this all the time, even if you will never forget your ex or virginity to her.You won't see them if you put any objects that remind you of her somewhere.Any gifts your ex gave you, pictures of the two of you together, or anything else along those lines are included.When they feel angry or rejected, some people throw away or destroy these items.Some people end up regretting their decision.It's better to put them in a box where you won't see them.You can decide if you want to keep those items after you've gotten over your ex.
Step 9: Write in a journal.
Private writing is a great way to process your feelings.You can use a journal to write about your feelings.You can use it as a diary, or write poems, stories or songs about how you are feeling.This can be a good place to vent your feelings if you think it's too private to share with others.Write about good things that make you feel better in your journal.You can use this to focus on positive changes in your life.
Step 10: It's time to rediscover yourself.
A lot of people struggle with who they are after a break up.It's easy to see your connection to the other person as a key part of your identity even in a short relationship.Getting past this will allow you to rediscover who you were without that person.This is a good time to think about your goals and try new things.Maybe you'll take up a new hobby, spend more time with friends, start working out or playing sports, or change your life for the better.You can move past your feelings for your ex by focusing on the present and creating new positive experiences.
Step 11: Give it time.
It will take some time to get over, and there is no way to fast- forward through the painful part of the break up.Don't rush it, because it will take a while to get over your ex.It takes an average of 11 weeks for a person to start feeling better after a relationship ends.It may take a little longer for you.This recovery is emotional because there was a first in your relationship.
Step 12: Don't go for the rebound.
The best way to get over someone quickly is to go out and find someone else.Some people think having sex with another person will get you over your ex.These "rebound" experiences are often not healthy.When you are having sex again, you can make comparisons between the new person and someone you still love.This can make you feel more isolated than before you started dating again.Rushing into a new relationship before you're done with your ex can end badly for both of you.If you lost your virginity, do not rush out and have sex with other people.A negative first like this can lead people to seek out similar experiences with others, leading to more bad experiences.Wait until you get your emotions under control before having sex again.
Step 13: When you are ready, start dating again.
If you are not dealing with intense emotional pain on a regular basis, you can start looking for a new relationship.Only you can tell when it's the right time.People are afraid to love someone again after a hard break up.It can be hard to open yourself up to the possibility of being hurt.It's worth it in the end.Break up with the person who you lost your virginity to is not the end of the world if you have new romantic experiences.