It can be awkward to deal with an overly friendly neighbor.There are steps you can take to address the issue if you feel the urge to spare their feelings.They will take the hint when you repeatedly avoid them or try to end conversations tactfully.You should confront them sooner than later if they don't.Explain to them the sort of neighborly relationship you would like to have and be firm, calm, and clear.
Step 1: Resist the urge to avoid them.
By pretending you're not home when they knock, or by peeking out your window to make sure they aren't around when you leave the house, you may be prolonging the issue.It is possible to set boundaries in a non-confrontational way.
Step 2: Before leaving, look outside.
The easiest way to avoid a friendly neighbor is to look outside.Wait a few minutes before opening the door if you can see them through the peephole or window.Wait for them to leave the building or enter their apartment if you hear them around the corner.
Step 3: Tell them you can't talk because you're in a rush.
They might see you head out and bombard you if you don't have time to wait for them to leave.It's time to stop a long-winded conversation.Keep walking if you smile, wave or say hello.Say something along the lines of, "Hello there!"I can't talk because I'm in a rush.They will take the hint after you do this a couple of times.
Step 4: To exit conversations, excuse yourself.
A neighborly conversation starts to get boring after four minutes.You should find a way to end the conversation if they start to gab.Try saying, "Well, I'm late for my appointment."Excuses include a lunch or dinner date, work, or meeting your workout partner.If you enter your home, you could say, "I have to start dinner, or I have piles of laundry to do" or something similar.
Step 5: Schedule chats for a later time.
If you don't feel safe answering at your door, you are not required to.If you feel comfortable answering the door, you can say, "Now is not a great time for me to talk."If you want to have a relationship with your neighbor, you should talk at an alternate time.Are you free tomorrow afternoon, around four?I would love to take a walk and catch up after that.You can tell them that it's best to call or set up something instead of popping in if you don't like them dropping by.
Step 6: How long will you be a neighbor?
If you are a renter or selling your home, you might want to tell your neighbor "Sorry, I don't have time to chat!"They don't get into a discussion about their behavior.If you and your neighbor are both homeowners or long-term renters, things are more complicated.It's better to confront them about your feelings than to allow tensions to build.
Step 7: They should be told sooner rather than later.
If you tried to avoid them with no luck, you might have to have a face-to-face conversation.As soon as you notice an issue you should make your feelings clear.Delaying a calm, firm conversation will only make them more aggressive.You might feel the urge to be nice and spare their feelings, but that could lead to a bigger issue in the future.When you finally make your feelings known, you will end up hurting their feelings even more.
Step 8: You should be honest about how they make you feel.
You should let your neighbors know about any issues.Don't sugarcoat your point, but be respectful and polite.Say that you are a nice person.I hope you don't find me rude, but I'm not very social.I like our chats, but they make me run late.
Step 9: If you are married or have a roommate, act as a united front.
Talk to your roommate or spouse about how to deal with your neighbor.Make sure you follow through with the strategy you came up with.Make sure you and your spouse or roommate are on the same page.Sending mixed signals will make the situation worse.If your neighbor follows you to your door, you could say, "My roommate and I have a 'call ahead' policy, we really don't like people dropping by."
Step 10: You want a neighborly relationship.
In your experience, good fences make good neighbors.Tell them that you would like to have an easy relationship and look out for each other's property, but aren't comfortable with anything else.I have become close with neighbors in the past, but ended up having a disagreement that made me wary of getting too close to my neighbors.I hope you don't get offended, but I think it's best to keep some boundaries.
Step 11: Ask your neighbor to stop gossiping.
Friendly neighborhood gossip can let you know about interesting local news.Keep your conversations short and to the point.If they start to make things personal, you should ask them not to.Try changing the subject or finding an excuse to leave if they start putting someone down.Let them know that you aren't friendly enough with them to share your secrets, if they ask about your business or opinion on someone else.Explain that you don't like talking about other people.
Step 12: Don't let your neighbor bring over food.
An overly friendly neighbor might try to make it a daily or weekly ritual to bake you a pie, even if it is nice.They might try to make you feel obligated to return the favor.Make it clear that you want them to stop if it becomes a problem.You are tired of your neighbor bringing over food every few days.I have to start making my own food.If they persist, reply by saying, "I really hate to say it, but it'll probably just go to."I really appreciate it, but we don't eat many sweets (or whichever items they prepare).
Step 13: If you have a neighbor who doesn't respect your space, deal with them.
In extreme cases, an overly friendly neighbor might try to get into your personal space.You should tell them to stop if it makes you uncomfortable, even if they think touching your shoulder is harmless.Stand up straight, look in the eye, and project confidence.If you are calm and assertive, you can say, "I don't feel comfortable with being touched like that."If your neighbor touches your shoulder and you don't find it threatening, politely tell them to stop.If they touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, tell them their actions are harassment and don't hesitate to report them to the authorities.
Step 14: If you feel unsafe, contact the authorities.
Sometimes an overly friendly neighbor can threaten your safety.If they respond in a threatening way, you should get help.Contact the property manager or homeowner's association first.They can help diffuse the situation.Call the police or emergency services if you think you're in danger.
Step 15: Inquire about relocating with your property manager.
If you live in an apartment complex, it is possible to move to another floor or part of the complex.You won't have to move to another complex if you avoid daily interactions with your neighbor.Discuss your situation with your property manager.Ask them if there are any apartments available on the other side of the complex.Since you're an existing resident relocating due to an issue that's out of your control, be sure to ask them to waive security deposits and other fees.